rules for this page: no performance, no fixing, no have you tried. just the raw stuff, straight out, unedited. this is where i put the things so they stop living in my chest. if you're a stranger who wandered in — scroll to the bottom, there's a number down there. that's the only useful thing i can give you.
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it never ends
i'm cold, part of me wants to lay in bed, given i am in so much pain, but another wants to stay up and work on stuff, play a game, whatever. Idk- i sleep enough as is, yknow?
sometimes i think i'm not a very good wife... anytime my husband has bad days at work, and comes home really upset or pissed off, i end up dissociating really badly, and then going quiet, which makes them feel worse ergo making me feel worse. mercury is in retrograde, so it's fucking up a lot of shit recently... take care during this wave.
i feel that being inside is both a blessing and a curse. on one hand, i am free of people, on the other hand, i crave to be social and to go outside at times. It's an odd dichotomy...